When our father died 13 years ago we got into a rather heated discussion of just who was going to take care of our mother with our siblings.
The fight was not about who was going to be stuck with her, quite the opposite we all wanted the privilege.
A similar confrontation was had over who got to care for our mother-in-law when our father-in-law passed away seven years ago and like the first it was not about avoiding the duty but rather wanting it.
It wasn’t nice to be in the middle of it, but it was nice to watch the grown children fight so hard yet so politely of who got to take care of their mother.
We come from a family of six children, our wife the same.
It was not so unusual back in the mid 20th century to have that many children.
Today more often than not, people are shocked to find out we have four children.
While our mother received her social security albeit briefly, she really didn’t depend on it.
Her monthly check was used in large part to buy things for her dozen grand babies as she liked to call them. It was nice to have but in reality if it disappeared the last years of her life would not have been that much different. the same was true for our mother-in-law. her pension was nice and it helped with the bills but if she never had one, she would have not noticed, we all would have spent just a little more.
We have been thinking of our parents now both passed, our children and our future grandchildren a lot these days especially in the great entitlement debate.
We know being on the tail end of the baby boom there is a very good chance that Social Security will be bust by the time we hit 65 as will many private and public pension plans.
And we also noticed something, it is something not talked about much today but it is noticeable. Just take a look at your facebook friends and count how many have children and how many friends have more than two.
A quick check of the US Census website confirms that never in the history of the world have there been so many old childless people. and their population is growing almost exponentially.
What will happen in say 20 or 30 years from now to them, if their pensions disappear and their Social Security checks never arrive?
We don’t think our society will let them starve to death but on the other hand we find it difficult to imagine two adult children already taking care of an aging parent to fight over who gets great old and childless Uncle Joe.
We are heading into uncharted waters of the great elderly and childless sea and we shudder to think of our course.